Keeping Our Identity: Part 2

Michelle responded to last week’s post with the following comment:

 “….Whenever we move to a new place I immediately began to find out what it is that I feel that I'm supposed to do while we are stationed there. I believe if I focus on that then I am being who I am and not just a military wife. So what ends up happening is that I become fulfilled and this carries over into my roles as a wife, mother and friend.”

 Thank you for sharing your experience Michelle. It is a relief to know that people will find what they are "supposed to do" eventually. I would be interested in finding out what other readers feel they are meant to do.

I think I have just really begun to understand what doing what you’re “supposed to” means.  Recently, I have taken up photography. At first I felt that it was pretty typical… it seems like everyone these days with a couple hundred bucks and an Apple computer is running around with their DSLR slung over their shoulder, snapping pictures of their friend’s babies and posting them on Facebook.  At first I was really self-conscious about it and I didn't even want to use the label "photographer." By using this label, I felt I had to own this as my profession and I wasn’t prepared for that. Even now, after quite a bit of experience, I prefer to say “I enjoy taking photographs.”

However, I slowly discovered that many people like to have their pictures taken because it makes them feel beautiful, and so many people just want to capture one second where they can look back and say, "I feel pretty."  My “payment” for taking pictures is when I see the joy on an expecting mother's face when she sees her pregnancy photos. And it is priceless to see a spouse smile and blush when I give her back her boudoir photos she intends to send her husband in Afghanistan. I walk away thinking, "I made someone feel pretty today." 

I didn’t have to be a world-renown photographer, I just had to be willing to ask..."would you like to have your picture taken?" When I ask that, I feel I am really asking, "can I make you feel beautiful?"  If they aren’t willing to have their pictures taken, then I don’t feel bad because I think this is what I am supposed to do....at least for now.

I think sometimes it just comes down to finding the courage to pursue something we like and finding a way to use that to give back. We don’t have to be an expert in a specific field, but I think if we discover something we love, go after it with everything we have then it can allow us to keep a sense of self…to keep our identity.

Thank you for your response, Michelle.  I would love to hear more from spouses that can share how they found "what they are supposed to do."

"Protect your enthusiasm from the negativity and fear of others. Never decide to do nothing just because you can only do little. Do what you can. You would be surprised at what 'little' acts have done for our world." 

-Steve Maraboli 

xoxo

Whit